This pandemic whereby you can no longer pass under a bridge without being assailed by Divorce’s Christian Punk is both very unlikely, and completely real. I can’t really see myself getting sick of it but can I just say, I want my shoes back, and I do feel sorry for the trainspotters.
Desmond Prince of Glasgow City Council Pest Control told us, ‘Look mate, stop calling me, i’ve never heard of “Divorce”, I am not a wizard, and our records clearly indicate that there are no bridges left in Scotland – I don’t even know why i’m fucking bothering to tell you this because we both know what happened not so long ago wh-‘, at which point I stopped listening. I don’t really like thinking about it see. We here at Alone-in-the-Woods-Core support the redevelopment of a competent City Council.
I think i’d like Divorce a lot more if they’d stop covering the fucking Cribs. I’d give this continuing series of unsettling public interruptions an I for ‘I-Ching’. Help me.